Inbox: Abraxas

[philancer]

INBOX text / action / horizon Roses are red, violets are blue,
and right now it seems I'm missing you.
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[philancer]

Trust me, that thought never even crossed my mind. [ In fact, he's chuckling at the very idea.

But he struggles to find the best way to describe it anyway. ]

It's more that... I know there are things you don't talk about, but I don't know where those lie among everything else. So rather than tripping blindly through a forest I'm not supposed to be trespassing in, as it were... I'd rather you guide the way where you've decided it's safe for me to be.

[ That's probably not the best metaphor, but it made sense in his head. ]

[godshattering]

[ If asked, Claude couldn't say what he was expecting in response. One or more of those questions lobbed out anyway, probably, or anything along those same lines. He'd opened the door for it and so there's nothing to do but wait for whatever it'll be with what'll be needed to counter it waiting at the ready.

But by the time Sylvain finishes talking, Claude feels seen. To his surprise - though he really shouldn't be surprised at all - it's not the awfully unnerving variety of that feeling usually paired with when someone pries a layer loose he's not ready to reveal. This is different. This is careful consideration of wanting to do the opposite in a way which certainly suggests Sylvain's thought this through in more than this very instant. Something thoughtful and not in a way he thinks is anything but the truth because it speaks to care. Or caring, something that's impossible to feel anything but affection over.

Whatever the expression is on his face given that even Claude doesn't entirely know at this point, he's certain it's entirely too honest when he didn't have a way to prepare for this. It's a masterful way around his defenses. But one thing he does know is that he's going to overthink it and everything else if he sits with the chance for that to happen too much longer.

And so, in the spirit of something else from Nocwich all those months ago and entirely too much fondness he doesn't have an outlet for, Claude lifts his free hand to place it on the side of the other man's face to turn it more towards his own. There's no hesitation, no second thought when he leans in to kiss Sylvain a second later. That's a better answer than anything else he has to give. ]

[philancer]

[ The moment drags out long enough after his answer that he's beginning to wonder if he's stumbled somewhere he shouldn't despite the care he'd taken choosing his words. He's not sure he knows what the expression on Claude's face means, but he thinks Claude's not all that sure either.

He's just about to open his mouth to say something else, to apologize, to take it back, to do anything to somehow fix whatever he'd fucked up when he feels Claude's fingers on his cheek. He has a moment to blink, and then there's warm lips on his own.

His breath hitches, an audible inhale around his surprise, but considering how long he's thought about this, imagined it, he's quick to recover, leaning into that kiss. Meeting Claude in the middle, lips parted as he tastes him. His own hand lifts, sliding around to cup at the nape of his neck, fingers warm on exposed skin. Tangling in dark hair. The quiet sound he makes is muffled into the kiss, soft want mixed with pleased satisfaction. ]

[godshattering]

[ The noise Sylvain makes cuts through everything else since he hadn't missed that flicker of something before he'd leaned in. Not with enough time to change his mind about what he was going to do after committing to not debating with himself, and if there was any question about anything, well. It's answered by the indelible fact that Sylvain is kissing him back.

Some of this might be easier if he, say, let go of Sylvain's hand. But rather than that he threads his fingers through the other man's to keep that contact on top of everything else, even while turning more in place to pull Sylvain a bit closer while deepening the kiss. There's the threat - a positive one - of getting swept away in everything since he can feel it starting between the other's hand on him, in his hair, simple as it is with the promise of more to come.

But. That would be too easy, wouldn't it? After a bit longer he breaks it but doesn't go far, what with pulling back just enough to grin against the other's lips with his thumb tracing over his cheek. ]

Might've been worth waiting several months for, [ is what he finally settles on murmuring, a rather severe understatement offset by pressing a kiss to the corner of Sylvain's mouth. ]

[philancer]

Might?

[ There's a playful note of indignation in that word as he nips at Claude's bottom lip in chiding for the insult. But there's warm laughter dancing in his dark eyes as his fingers stroke against the nape of the other man's neck, not pulling away. Reluctant to relinquish any of this closeness now that they've ventured this far. ]

Pretty sure this is the longest bout of flirtation I've ever participated in.

[ He almost said foreplay, because that also feels accurate here, but he's not jumping to assumptions just yet. Despite everything Claude had teased at dinner. Besides. He's pretty comfortable with finding out what pace they're both ready to move at together. Claude's already the exception to too many of the rules he's always lived by. ]

[godshattering]

Are you saying it should've been longer? Don't worry, we could can just pretend this didn't happen to take it back and draw it out some more.

[ Even if someone happened to be walking by just then with no further context, they wouldn't find Claude's teasing tone believable. Sylvain set himself up for that one even if there's no such thing as taking this back. Or there probably isn't, anyway, not without some concerted ignoring on both of their parts. It's not something Claude's planning on doing, but that doesn't mean he's not going to use it to tease all the same. ]

I wouldn't want to deprive you of truly setting a record after all.

[ One that'll have to only be in theory, further evidenced by shifting his hand to tuck longer strands of Sylvain's hair back behind his ear rather than pulling away even as for the umpteenth time tonight he puts on a faux thinking expression. ]

Another half a year might round it out nicely, wouldn't it?

[philancer]

Nope. Too late. You made the fatal mistake of admitting you liked me. You're not getting rid of me now. No take-backs.

Besides. You've pretty much broken every record I've had. [ It's confessed with a sheepish chuckle, but it's true enough. Sylvain never would have put so much effort into a mere flirtation back home. None of them had been worth weeks of pursuing, let alone months. ]

I have every faith that you will think up new and inventive ways of driving me mad, however, so it's not a complete loss on your part. [ His grin is cheeky as he lets his fingers smooth through Claude's dark hair, tugging lightly. But the echoing brush of Claude's fingers have his resistance crumbling again and he leans back in to steal another kiss. It's slow and deliberate, savoring the fact that this is real. That Claude hadn't pushed him away, or laughed, or just dismissed him entirely.

He could still kick himself for not pressing for more that day in Nocwich, but at the same time... it made this more special somehow. More important. This wasn't some potion-induced misadventure that Claude would come to regret when he sobered up again. It wasn't an impulsive indulgence that could turn into a wedge, or worse, a weapon.

...That doesn't mean he's not still resisting the urge to pinch himself, all the same. ]

[godshattering]

That just makes it sound like there's still records left there to break. Maybe I was wrong and you're really just telling me to redouble my efforts.

[ Or - that really sounds a bit more like what Sylvain says following that more than anything else Claude's cobbled together to wedge into that meaning all of the sake of teasing the other. That's easier, to spin a meaning into something else, than to think for longer than a second about how endearing that chuckle had been. Like it was supposed to underscore what sounded like a truth even if Claude has nothing to compare it to and no one to ask if that was really the case.

Maybe that doesn't matter; it's not like the past affects anything they do here in ways they can control. The past is the reason they're sitting here, all those tangled paths centered around one mercenary with a sword and a gift and all those paths fading away to differences. All of it had to lead somewhere, didn't it?

But the present is Sylvain's mouth on his again after he leans in once more, and it's the pleased noise that escapes Claude when that hand in his hair pulls ever so slightly. It might've been muffled by the lips on his without much of a chance to reverberate since he's a little too distracted by this. All of it. The outline of something new and something else he's still figuring out and deliberately not looking at any closer to just let it exist.

It's with that in mind that it's Claude who breaks the kiss again after a little while and this time to lean his forehead against Sylvain's, a decision reached. ]

Not that your decision to bring us out here wasn't a good one, [ tacit approval once more as he keeps his tone light to prevent himself from changing the second half of his sentence, ] but there's also a rather nice hotel room not far from here.

[philancer]

I think you’ve safely moved on from breaking old records to making ridiculous new ones.

[ The words are smiled against Claude’s lips as he lingers in the kiss, dragging it out, fingers brushing slightly against warm skin and dark hair.

But Claude doesn’t pull away, even when he breaks the kiss this time and Sylvain allows one eyebrow to arch in playful inquiry. ]

That’s true. A very comfy one, at that. Don’t tell me you’re getting sleepy already?

[ The question is asked innocently enough, but the mischief dancing in his eyes likely gives him away. ]

[godshattering]

[ Noted about the records, he thinks, though curiosity as to what they are doesn't end there. It can wait since Sylvain's just asking for it with that next part, really, so without further ado he tips his head back a bit for a well practiced and extremely fake yawn so that it's not completely in the other's face. But close enough. ]

You caught me. It took about a day and a half to put this dress on so it'll probably take that long to take it back off. We'll both need a nap by then.

[ It did no such thing - plus whatever struggle there was to get it on had been entirely Claude's fault due to a temporary lack of common sense, so logically the removal process will go smoother. That's also not completely the response he expected and the longer he thinks about it, the more a thread of doubt begins to creep in despite his best efforts to keep it away. Maybe he'd misread something somewhere along the way. He won't let that show on his face though, instead raising an eyebrow to return the teasing that's clear on the other man's face. ]

Or if that's your way of saying you're tired, then 'no thanks' is always an option. Sounds awfully boring for me, though.

[philancer]

Don’t worry. [ Sylvain’s voice is teasingly deadpan now. ] I happen to be an expert at removing dresses. I’ve got you covered.

[ Still there’s the faintest twitch at the corner of his lips, like he’s fighting back a smirk. He pushes to his feet, however, before holding out a hand to help Claude up as well. ]

And no. Tired is the absolute last thing I am right now. [ He pauses, trying to gauge how much to say, before shrugging and deciding on trying honesty again. It seemed to be working alarmingly well for him tonight. ] I just didn’t want to assume how far you were comfortable going beyond kissing.

[godshattering]

[ That he can laugh at, both because of the statement and the utter dryness with which it's said. ]

Alright, point taken. Maybe I should've said your outfit instead since I think it has considerably more layers.

[ Maybe; Claude didn't pay that much attention to the finer details of what he was putting on. That or any other clothing issues don't actually matter to him as he takes Sylvain's hand to get up and doesn't let go afterwards. But he does pause to run that next statement through his head a couple of times while they walk, because while he's sorely tempted to tease Sylvain about this - it still says something, Claude thinks, that the assumption wasn't made. He wouldn't have cared either way in the sense of taking offense, and yet. ]

So showing off these boots several times over wasn't direct enough, was it. [ Claude's trying to smother a grin without much success even if it's the maximum amount of teasing he's allowing himself. For now. ] Don't worry, I have ways of fixing that. But they still have to wait for a hotel room, so good thing we're headed there.

[philancer]

I happen to be almost as skilled at taking off men’s clothing as well. [ This time he is smirking playfully, since that was just a ridiculous statement in general.

Claude doesn’t release his hand and he finds he doesn’t mind that at all as they make their way back up the jetty towards the beach. Their fingers remain entwined, shoulders occasionally bumping as they walk together.

But he sees that grin anyway, Claude, and he just laughs softly, purposefully nudging into Claude’s side this time as they hit the boardwalk once more and he turns them back in the direction of town - and the inn awaiting them.]

Look, I don’t even need to make assumptions to know you’re the world’s biggest tease. And considering it’s me saying that, that’s really impressive. You’ve been tossing innuendo at me since the first night you found me here and I’m pretty sure you weren’t actually ready to tumble into bed with me all the way back there.

[godshattering]

[ That's another point in Sylvain's favor - not that Claude's going to say as much in favor of a tsk as though he's somehow been offended by the implication (accurate statement) of teasing (a thing he was very much doing). Claude shifts his mouth to one side like he's thinking, possibly, if it wasn't for it being an attempt to hide yet another smile. ]

Maybe I was just waiting for you to be as fully skilled at taking off men's clothing in the meantime. Or, more accurately, [ definitely more accurately, ] I was trying to figure out if you were planning on killing me or not. Well, at first, since even I can't pretend that part lasted for more than a month or so.

[ Saying it nonchalantly makes that truth more palatable, right? Probably not, but he's not planning on giving Sylvain too much time to dwell on it with the inn drawing ever closer. Not when there's something better to add to that, too. ]

Nocwich had something to do with in there, too. And if we're reaching that far back to point things out, then might I also remind you I'm pretty sure I've mentioned I like when the odds of something are in my favor. Playing them certainly worked out well for this.

[philancer]

[ His steps stumble in an uncharacteristic moment of clumsiness, and were it not for their fingers still entwined and the fact that Claude was still walking, he might have stopped right there on the boardwalk to gape at him in shock. ]

Wait, you thought I was gonna kill you?! [ He is so… very confused right now. ] For a whole month?!

…Man. I really need to rethink my flirting technique with you entirely, don’t I?

[godshattering]

[ Sylvain's surprise practically shifts the air between them even before that false step telegraphs it through their linked hands. It's expected. Here's where he should respond with a shrug and play it off as something else. In on the joke, like it is one. Instead there's a long moment - too long of a moment - where Claude says nothing and continues to look at Sylvain sidelong in silence. Cynicism and skepticism certainly are difficult habits to shake and they come to the forefront again momentarily.

He could just laugh. It'd take all of a second to do it, ready as that reaction among all the others always is. But they've been trying at honesty here and there, and Claude's not ready to undo that. All of that is a series of quick calculations shifting one factor here and another there before he finally says, ] Let's just say it wouldn't be the first time someone wanted me to put my guard down for their own reasons.

[ Claude's smiling while he says this as he looks back ahead of them again, but that smile doesn't extend anywhere past its edges. That's all the explanation Sylvain gets. ]

[philancer]

[ But Sylvain tugs him back, holding tight to his hand, his other arm snaking around Claude’s waist as he glances down at him with a slight frown. He searches Claude’s face, the moonlight casting long shadows across his features.

There’s so much layered in those words, but again, he’s not sure how much of it -if any - is safe to prod at. But he can guess. He knows too much not to be able to piece together some idea of what Claude’s referring to. Which is infuriating, honestly, and he wishes he knew who it was so he could return the favor with a blade through their cowardly guts.

Lifting his hand, he slides his fingers along Claude’s jaw this time. Struggling with his own emotions, but pushing it aside for now. The fact that Claude hadn’t laughed this off was telling enough in itself. ]

I guess I can’t blame you, in that case. Although usually when I get accused of having my own motives, it’s often for far more scandalous reasons.

[ He wishes he could give Claude promises to reassure him, but despite everything, he’s not sure how much weight his word actually holds. Besides, when it comes to loyalty, he’s always thought actions spoke louder anyway. Promises were all too easily broken. ]

For what it’s worth, I’m far more likely to pester you with terrible innuendo about weapons than actually using one on you. [ Not wanting to completely ruin the mood, he lets his hand drop away from Claude’s cheek as he gets them walking again. ] Then again, between your shaft and my spear, the possibilities there are conveniently endless.

[godshattering]

[ It's the pull back that makes Claude think, mistake even if the expression on his face doesn't change from something pleasant. As a result he's looking at Sylvain without realizing seeing the other, already planning five steps ahead for something to say to brush it off when whatever reaction it'll be is just another version of whatever else he's already heard when mentioning some smaller piece of this rather than this particular secret he's chosen to trust Sylvain with.

Except that reaction never comes, and when a hand that's quickly becoming familiar finds his face Claude has to blink Sylvain back into focus after all. Whatever he was going to say about it obviously being some reference to the war only is forgotten when he registers the look on the other's face. It's not what he expected; in fact, it seems almost like understanding if he looks close enough.

Guess I can't blame you, Sylvain says, rather than what most people would do: be upset they were even tangentially accused of something nefarious or upset over being grouped in with those who're capable of it. Claude's not going to ask about that either even though he could. The opportunity to do so is right there. Sylvain doesn't question him more about what he meant so he follows that lead, but not without feeling like he's been handed something valuable. Something he'll hoard away to think about for a while, something that feels like a gift.

Aside from terrible not quite puns - this, at least, is something far more familiar and easy to slip back into with a predictable groan and roll of his eyes to wash that prior conversation away. At least his smile this time around is less of an act. ]

Please tell me you aren't about to put one of the collapsible swords in your pockets in hopes I'll ask if there's something in there or if you're just happy to see me. Don't think I won't kick you out of bed for that particularly terrible innuendo if it's on your list of them.

[philancer]

Pretty sure you have to get me into your bed before you can kick me out of it.

[ It's easy enough, to slip back into old teasing habits. Lighthearted banter. As if something deep and dark hadn't just been shared and acknowledged between them. Old wounds that may never completely heal over. He's not surprised to find Claude has them, too. Maybe he'd recognized that in him from the start.

But he'll deal with the implications of that at another time. Tonight's not the right time for that. And with the inn coming into sight ahead of, windows brightly lit from within, it has him tugging Claude along with him again, like an overeager child. ]

And no, that wasn't what I had in mind at all, but considering it would annoy you that much, I may have to reconsider it on principle.

[godshattering]

That's the whole point of where we're headed now, isn't it? C'mon, Gautier, keep up.

[ As if there's anything to chide over - as if Sylvain's actually somehow forgotten despite being the one pulling him along to their destination (and as if there's any resistance on his part, which there isn't). It's more fun to play up something that feels inevitable what with how every path they've been on for months now led here like they were meant to in the end. ]

Unless you're implying you won't be kicked out of my bed at any point. In which case - I'll take that into consideration depending on how tonight goes.

[ With a smirk over one shoulder just because as they reach the inn's front doors and Claude grabs the nearest handle to pull it open for them to lead both through. Or, well, maybe one of them. ]

Gentlemen first, since you're being one despite that I never claimed I would be myself.

[philancer]

I'm always a gentleman, thanks.

[ That's such a lie that it's impressive he manages it with a mostly straight face as he precedes Claude into the quiet lobby beyond the front doors. It's growing late, so he bypasses any of the workers here and tugs Claude immediately towards the stairs that leads up to their room on the third floor. He might have splurged on it, getting them a comfortable one with a balcony that overlooks the sea. If they were going to make a Trip of this, might as well make it memorable. ]

And I don't plan on getting myself kicked out of your bed. Does that count?

[godshattering]

[ That just gets a snort of laughter from him since even if Sylvain's keeping it together, Claude's too entertained to pretend like there's any other reaction he's going to have. Not that any of it matters to him anyway, what with how manners and etiquette from Fodlan's tight grip on how things should be done matter here. All of that's left behind.

Speaking of pretending: he is going to do just that while they walk up the stairs, using the ascension to look like he's very seriously contemplating this with the appropriate amount of time needed. Even if there's a good chance Sylvain's rather familiar with this particular antic of his by now, what with how often it's used, but. Once they make it upstairs and while Sylvain handles the door, that's the perfect time to shrug. ]

I suppose it could count for something. That'll have to remain to be seen, don't you think?

[ Circular answer time: everyone's favorite. There is actually a point he's going to make in there, probably, but when the door opens it's replaced by Claude raising his eyebrows. Maybe earlier hadn't been the only thing planned for if this is anything to go by, and after a glance at the bed he approaches the doors leading to the balcony to peer out them curiously while making no move to actually go back outside. ]

Interesting you decided to forego this view for the one from the harbor. Or, [ with great deliberation as Claude turns in place to lean his back against the door and without bothering to hide his smirk, ] maybe you have a better view in mind.

[philancer]

I'm pretty sure you've already been providing that all evening.

[ Claude's comment is countered easily and with a cheeky grin as he playfully gives the other man's form - still clad in the bet of the evening - a pointed once-over. He nudges the door shut behind him, leaving them in the quiet privacy of the room, and takes a few steps towards him where he waits at the balcony doors. ]

But I could have you thinking my reputation was all just idle gossip now. Besides. If I want to coerce you into a second date, I wanted to make a good impression. I seem to recall you being way out of my league, after all.

[ That hadn't had anything to do with it, actually. He'd just thought Claude would like the view from the jetty. It's also the reason he'd picked this room at the inn, as well. He'd wanted it to be... special. ]

[godshattering]

No, this, [ as he lifts one hand to wave it along his body in the exact path Sylvain's eyes had just traced, just to emphasize he'd noticed that and each and every other gaze like it, ] is just one view of many. And when I say 'many' I mean think of all the possibilities.

[ For a second he almost says aim higher, but that aligns a little too closely with the rest of what Sylvain's said and for that Claude needs a little more time to parse through whether it was supposed to be a compliment with an edge where the blade of it's something Sylvain's using on himself or if it simply sounded like it.

But. Now's not the time for that when the room's door is properly closed and Sylvain, despite dragging up his reputation once more, seems to be contemplating walking this way. And really - even as someone prone to overthinking anything and everything - Claude thinks that won't do. ]

If you need some help narrowing it down, let's start with this: you can either get on the bed, or you can sit here. [ Said paired with a gesture of his hand to each place in question, the latter being an oversized armchair in the nearest room corner with a nice view of the sea outside, not that he plans on either of them enjoying it for that right now. Maybe later. ] Your choice.

[philancer]

[ Sylvain's eyebrow arches upwards as his feet stop, giving him a moment to debate those possibilities. And while the chair looks plenty comfy...

He moves to sink down on the edge of the bed closest to Claude, leaning back to prop himself up on his hands as he grins at the other man. ] Figure I'd save future!me the delay of moving here eventually anyway. More possibilities over here. Although the chair does sound like fun. Maybe we can try that one out later.